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Archive for the ‘Miscellaneous’ Category

Eventful day I suppose

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

I just saw a cute little garter snake that looks just like the one in the photo (but mine appeared to have a full belly) slither across my driveway. I want to keep him, he’s pretty cute.

I have spent all day being a travel agent making arrangements for Las Vegas for the AVN show as well as planning my company Christmas party. You know, if this porn thing doesn’t work out I have a future as travel agent πŸ™‚

I booked flights, hotels, you name it. This month has been pretty crazy in the travel department. Last Christmas for our company party we did a spinning wheel with different vacations you could land on. Well, every singe one of them changed the vacation they won, changed the flights, changed the dates and all. I had to rebook shit, pay out more money and basically it was just a big pain in the ass. One employee got back from Hawaii last week, btw, her original trip was for Cancun, don’t ask. Another employee just got home late last night from New York almost too exhausted to work and claims she spent all her money while there. One guy is down in Cabo in the middle of a hurricane and my office manager is flying down to Cabo (her trip was for Cozumel) tomorrow and she will either be just in time for the hurricane to pass or be there right in the eye of the beast. A few months ago Tim went to New Orleans, his original trip was for Cabo (guess he had a premonition about the hurricane) and next month I have our programmer, Jeff, going to Maui. Cross your fingers that nothing goes wrong with his trip. Like I said, I’ll never do that again. I am keeping it simple this year. Yeah, that’s what I always say. Now my neck hurts from sitting at the computer all day. My ears keep popping and my left foot is going numb. I guess it is time to get up and stretch my ass. Pilates sounds good or at least a nice long dog walk.

My Monkey Baby and I’m all wet!

Tuesday, October 6th, 2009

Did anyone see that show on the TLC channel? It is a new show called “My Monkey Baby” where these people treat their monkey like it is a little human baby. This is a photo of Jessica Marie. Her “parents” have set aside money so that when they die she will be taken care of. I guess these monkeys live to be 50 years old. Too funny. There are some fucked up people out there! I am bad about my dogs but come on, I don’t put them in a stroller and take them to the store!

On a different note, my new update today is poolicious. I’m in the pool and splashing around. I had fun getting wet. It was 100 degrees up until this weekend. I swear the equator is moving north, either that or again, more proof of global warning. I love those people that think that global warning is just a theory. That cracks me up even more than the damn Monkey Baby show. Oh well, I’m off to go take a shower. I am going up to LA tomorrow to meet with my accountant to finalize taxes. See, getting wet again!

Home and Happy

Tuesday, August 25th, 2009

It was such a pleasant drive home. We even stopped off at our favorite gas station where they have goats and horses and chickens. I fell inlWe drove from Mammoth Lakes to my in-laws where they threw me a birthday party with all the family. We had tri-tip roast on the grill, vegetables, salad, wine and more wine. We sat in the spa and it was a wonderful evening. I came home this morning from there and now I am ready to work. I have so many emails to do it is overwhelming. I am unpacking and catching up on things at the office. It is always comforting to be home but I just love the mountains. I think I would prefer to live there than on the beach where I grew up. The ocean view is nice but as I get older I much prefer that of mountain tops and lush green valleys. See, I may just end up a hermit living in the mountains with all my critters never showering or shaving again. Sorry Ryan.

Speaking of showering, I need to go take one right now before Ryan gets home.

Broken window but I got my purse!

Thursday, August 20th, 2009

What a day I had yesterday going out and about in Los Angeles. I got a breast thermography to see if the girls have anything wrong with them. So far it looks good but I won’t have the results until Monday and then I have to have a followup in 3 months. It was completely pain free, a much better experience than a mammography. I can’t even get a good result from a mammography because my breasts are so dense. I then went to AIM to get tested and then to my dermatologist to check on some suspect skin cancer on my shoulder. My doctor assured me it wasn’t cancerous and AIM again proved I am still HIV negative and no apparent breast cancer so woo hoo, I’m going to be turning 42 and medically clean as a whistle!

After all the medical appointments we hit a professional prop company to get ready for our 300th Pornfidelity episode. This company has 4 huge warehouses full of everything you can imagine. As we were walking across the street from one warehouse to the other I noticed a young man carrying my purse! I screamed and yelled and darted across the street right up to his face and went off on him. I guess I scared him because he dropped my purse and began to run. I stopped and dropped to the ground to inspect my purse to make sure nothing was missing while Ryan kicked off his flip flops and chased the guy barefoot down Santa Monica Blvd. Ryan ran for several blocks weaving in and out of traffic and jumping in front of cars and eventually grabbed an old man’s bicycle to chase after the perpetrator. The kid got away but luckily for me there was nothing missing from my purse. The only bad thing was that our window of our new Cadillac Escalade Hybrid was all busted out πŸ™

Feeling bitchy, feeling blue…

Wednesday, August 12th, 2009

Just one of those days I guess. Even my dog is acting like a spoiled brat. He is laying on the bed crying with this low level suppressed crackled cry because I am typing and not petting him. OH SHIT! He just took up about 100 octaves. I am now medically deaf thanks to Trey. I need to go walk the dogs to end this ceaseless baying and then I am laying down and watching some TV and floating away to place far far away…
I think I’ll watch the last few episodes of “True Blood” that I have missed these last 3 weeks. I really like that show. Quite provocative πŸ™‚

Saying Goodbye to Michael Jackson

Tuesday, July 7th, 2009

I haven’t blogged about it earlier because I have just been so sad about his passing. I loved Michael. I grew up listening to the Jackson 5 and then fell in love with Michael when “Off the Wall” came out. I was able to see him and his brothers in concert back in 1983 and then I saw Michael again in concert after “Thriller” came out. I even have a singed autograph of Michael in my office that I got in the 80’s. I always loved him and I always thought he was misunderstood. I watched the memorial today and I cried my eyes out. If only he were alive to see the outpour of love he may have not had to medicate himself so much. The trials and the speculations and accusations killed him. I feel he was always innocent. I am going to miss him like everyone else. I have never felt this way about an entertainer passing. I felt like I knew him, as if he were a part of my life. I am grieving like so many others. I thought the memorial was awesome. I think Elizabeth Taylor and Diana Ross are selfish for not attending. If they cared so much for him then why couldn’t they be there to support even his children. If it were the other way around I feel as though Michael would attend their memorials. I hate selfish people. And yes, I said hate.

Oh well, I am off to bed so I can’t rant on and on any longer. Anyways, I have to keep my mind on my doggy tonight. I am taking him in for surgery possibly tomorrow at 9:00AM. I found a new lump on Saturday night and I was squeezing on it when it sort of burst inside him. It then swelled up and in less than 12 hours grew about 10 times larger than it was. I know, I’m a dork. I took him in the vet that Sunday and they took a sample. I talked to the vet tonight and it might possibly be cancerous or just a bad reaction to what I did. Pray for me that it isn’t cancer. I love my baby. It was hard saying goodbye to Michael but saying goodbye to Trey will absolutely kill me.

I finally found a new band I really like

Friday, July 3rd, 2009

OK, my husband inundates me with reggae music until I want to puke. Let me defend myself, I love me some Zigggy Marley or of course, the Bob, and Israel Vibrations and several other classic reggae style bands but he plays it 24/7. I am not kidding. I like music that is faster paced and I really get into lyrics. I was up late after shopping and tanning tonight. I ran around and got a slip and slide for the “teen” themed shoot tomorrow along with a headset for doing skype calls and returned some bathing suits that never would have fit me in a million years from Target. I was watching Jimmy Kimmel and this band came on called Phoenix. The sound was fresh, I liked the beat and the lead singer is great. Oh geez, I sound like I am being interviewed on American Bandstand. Well, as old as I am I bought a few songs on itunes and I love them. I am listening as I write this. Go check them out for yourself.

Smokey eyes and squeeze those thighs!

Wednesday, June 17th, 2009

OK, I barely put on any make-up today. I went to the bank and to the store but before running out the door, I put on a little tiny bit of eyeliner. My make-up artist Kip left some eyeliner at my house so I put it on. I went into the bank and the girl was looking at me funny but I thought to myself “whatever” and went to the grocery store. The guy who checked me out kept looking at me. He would look directly into my eyes and for a check-out clerk I thought he was a bit flirty but he was hot so I went with it. I flirted back and I have to admit, it sort of made my day. Well, I asked Kip to come over to my house once I returned to bring me over some potting soil, I know glamorous life I lead, when after about 10 minutes he asked if he could have a Qtip. I asked why and he said to fix my eyeliner. I looked in the mirror and it was terrible. The eyeliner had smudged and dripped down my eyes. It looked like a joke. I had big huge black circles around my eyes. I was so pissed. That is what the grocery clerk was looking at, not staring seductively into my eyes but looking at my goofy eyes! Kip thought it was funny and so did Shantal our editor once he got back to the office. This is the photo they emailed me. Thanks guys, where were you before I left the house?

On with the rest of my day. Well, I am here on the computer doing emails and writing my blog and such. I didn’t have time to go to the gym so as I sit here I am squeezing my thighs as part of a lame ass workout. The only thing I am accomplishing is that it is starting to get me excited. The more I squeeze my thighs the more my clit starts to quiver. This is just going to end up with some masturbating and not tightening my legs I can tell.

A few questions I was recently asked, thought I would share them with you.

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

1. Kelly, how and when did you enter adult film industry? 33

2. Were you a bad girl in high school? I guess you were… Not really, lets just say I was a late bloomer.

3. How did your family react to your career choice? My father had already passed but my mother was extremely supportive for me to start my website.

4. Do you think you inherited the adventurous personality from your father who was a stunt man? Yes, he was also a big ham just like me πŸ™‚

5. Let’s talk about your beautiful big boobs. Do they have names? I mean pet names like sweety and baby? Do you think getting implants is pretty much a prerequisite for getting the good jobs in porn? No nicknames other than neck pain and back pain, that could be their names! I do think the girls in our industry need implants because large breasts are so sexual and bigger than life. If I didn’t naturally grow them I would have had surgery for sure.

6. The best orgasm you’ve ever had? Doing what, with whom? With my husband on the first night of our honeymoon. I am not making this up. He was fucking me and rubbing his thumb on my clit and we were in Rome. It was so damn explosive. I screamed so loud that I think a few blocks fell off the Colosseum!

7. What’s your favorite position? Why? On video would be doggy so my tits can swing to and fro but in my personal life, missionary so that I can be fucked, kissed and held all at the same time

8. I see you and your husband are swingers. Tell me about your swinging lifestyle. How long have you been swingers, and why did you choose to make swinging a part of your sex life? We discovered it about 7 years ago. I like girls and he likes girls so it was an easy choice to make. We just went one step further and started to film our escapades and then hire girls to fuck us. Easy as that.

9. What is your relationship like? Can you cheat anytime you want? No, and he only has sex with other women when I am not around if it is for a scene. He’s a good boy and I am true as the day is long.

10. Does your private sex life improve your sex in porn movies, or is it vice-versa? Any example? Real life enhances sex on camera. My husband and I will be having sex and we stop and say now lets do this on camera.

11. What is your relationship like with your cousin Janine Lindemulder? We don’t get to see each other much but she is always in my heart, especially now that she is in prison. It is so stupid that she has to go for 6 months.

12. How would you rate your: Blowjob skills? Anal skills? DP skills? GangBang skills? And, If I asked actors you’ve worked with to describe you, what do you think they would say? Blowjob – effective, Anal – good but not often enough, DP – I can take it like a champ – Gang Bang with 4 other girls and my husband, a 10! I think the other girls I worked with would say I have a nice long tongue and I know how to use it.

13. Your energy level is super high, you milk dicks so well until cum shoots from them like a fountain! Where does your energy come from? Caffeine and genetics.

14. Tell me a very dirty sex story from your personal life. I think my site portrays my personal dirty sexy stories from my real life. I like to eat pussy and I like to see my man sticking his cock in other women. We could be here all day with all my stories!

15. Tell me about and what makes it so special and unique. It is special because it is so huge. My site is one of if the largest individual model site on the net today.

16. How have your career goals been evolving since you started working in porn? From the beginning of my site to the development of and our successful DVD series I have always strived to give the customer the best I can. I am now working with such better technology and my team is so excellent at what they do now so the new content I produce is so much better than before.

17. How, if at all, does being a successful entrepreneur affect work-life balance? Does it bring any change to your lifestyle? Thank you for the compliment first of all. I love my work and I am able to have the freedom to work from home. I wouldn’t have it any other way. My husband works with our employees at our office so this allows me a lot of personal time to spend with my dogs and to work harder on my site and developing shoot ideas and to write to my fans.

18. Porn is a profitable business, and you make much more money that the average person. What do you plan to do with the money you earn? I have SEP Iras, I have a 401K for myself and my employees and I have invested in real estate which I hope takes a positive turn in the future. I am not that into buying expensive purses and shoes and jewelry. I like having money in the bank and money in retirement. I took a few years and spent my money foolishly but I quickly learned that an impulse buy doesn’t feel as good as a fat wallet and I think my priorities are straight now. I also enjoy giving to charity. My dream is to some rich old lady who just gives away her money all the time to the needy.

19. Under what conditions do you feel the greatest serenity and happiness? When I am giving to others.

20. What are your hobbies? My dogs, cooking, my dogs, traveling, my dogs, interior decorating, my dogs, and oh, did I mention my dogs?dsc_00812

21. Do you have a favorite motto or slogan? Work hard, play hard, love hard!

Why are my breasts so large and getting larger?

Saturday, June 6th, 2009

Geez, I am telling you, my beasts are growing. Here is a photo from almost 9 years ago. Love the black hair, it softens my face so much – NOT. Look at the recent photos from my site. I think I am officially larger than a 34FF. I think I am a 34H and the “H” stands for Hellaciously large or as my husband would say “Halleluyea”. Seriously, I wear the same size pants and skirts but I am busting out of my bras. I think it could be a medical condition πŸ™‚1219_01photo from Sunny Day Play321l8688

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